Friday, January 23, 2009

Who cares?

I have been working 10-12 hours almost every day on Weavolution. I am so tired I could cry. My right hand is killing me, I have surgery Tuesday and won't have any use of my right hand for 2 weeks. My back is screaming from sitting at the computer so much and I just got told off via email by a friend of one of my partner's. Don't we all get to be boneheads once in a while. I realize she and her husband can't see my side of it. He told me off via email. I wrote back a terse response and now she is pissed too. Great. So, no one really cares about any of this s**t except me. (sorry, I am usually a G rated person but this one got under my very thin, tired skin). I shouldn't give anyone the power to upset me like this. We have over 300 fans of Weavolution on our Yahoo group, that should be good enough. My problem is I try too hard sometimes. And now I've allowed this person to bring me to tears. Of all the people to offend. I had to find the one donor who is friends with one of my partners and who believes I am a mean, nasty bonehead.

Besides having my right hand in a brace, I am relying on my left hand more and 3 fingers have started triggering again. So both hands are killing me. Now, it's all poured out. I feel better. I'm leaving the computer on and going to weave. It's too late, I screwed up and I can't undo it. What I will take away from this is to examine my thoughts and feelings about someone who may have offended me in the past and make certain I forgive them. I don't think there is anyone like that in my life but I will give it some thought. Have we all forgotten about forgiveness? Where did it go? And, I don't believe there is anyone reading this anyway so it's all an exercise in diary writing. It's true, nobody really cares about any of this but me.


Hilary said...

We are all boneheads at one time or another. All you can do is own up to it, and move on. People who really care about us will forgive us being boneheads, and the rest don't matter. that is my opinion, at any rate....and oh, by the way....someone is reading your blog.

KathyB. said...

I'm reading your blog, and I am sorry you hurt inside and out and in your heart. Hilary is right on in her comment.

Hope your surgery is a success and you're hand is feeling better sooner than expected.

ClaudiaJane said...

Thanks ladies, I feel better. Your comments really help.

Gwen said...

Another reader here! :)

I'm sorry you are having such a sucky time right now... :(

I wish I could say something profound and helpful, but (in my experience) life just goes like that sometimes. All you can is exactly what you are doing - try to learn something from it and move on.

Most importantly of all, I hope your surgery goes well and you are feeling better very, very soon! You'll be in my thoughts...

Hang in there! :)

marie said...